I HATE LAWYERS--I HATE LAWYERS

It's a wonder We the People haven't risen up and burnt the court system to the ground by now. Thugs, thieves and general malcontents do what they want and walk out of the system and back onto the street to do it all again because they have nothing to lose. The average guy...traffic ticket here (cha-ching), watering your lawn on a non-watering day, fine (cha-ching), your car windows are tinted not to standard (cha-ching), Divorce, (cha-ching). It's all about the money and the Court System and the legions of blood-sucking members of the Bar all feast upon the average person. I won't even go into Jury Duty...perfect waste of time. I went to Jury Duty many times, but I remember one occasion in particular when there was actually a Lawyer in the Jury pool. The judge dismissed him from Jury Duty with these words that I will never forget: "...he's entirely too busy to be on a Jury." I guess the Lawyers time is a lot more important than the average persons, huh judge?

Why are there so many lawyer jokes? Because most of them are true. I'm not real fond of judges either...they used to be lawyers. I can see why in recent years, certain individuals have taken it upon themselves to "take out a judge." I can't condone it, but I can certainly understand it.

The system just does not work for the people. It only seems to work for the lawyers and people in the legal profession. Example: OJ Simpson gets off because he can afford to hire the best lawyers. If he tried to defend himself, or get an average (worthless) lawyer that the rest of us are forced to hire, he would have been strung up in court within two days of testimony and the judge would have probably held the noose!


So what's my beef. The average person (I consider myself average, even on my extraordinary days) goes to court a few times in their life: traffic tickets, jury duty, divorce. I've done all three, but this post is about the divorce.



So the wife and I came to an agreement before she became my ex. We both had lawyers. Pretty much split everything down the middle and I give her a little extra to compensate for my business and I pay her $600/month for the next 8 years. ( I might add, I didn't split from her, she just wasn't happy any more. boo hoo).



So we split assets down the middle, but her lawyer placed a lien on our house. According to the agreement, we were both to pay for our own legal bills, however, guess who would up paying for half her legal fees? (more about this in just a bit) Then, our sale agreement said that we were to pay to the buyer, outside of Escrow, about $18,000 within 2 days of funding. I paid my share, but my wife (on advice of her dumb fuck sister) decided paying the seller anything outside of Escrow was illegal. Even though her signature is on the agreement. So to keep from being sued by the new buyer, his real estate agent and our own real estate agents, I paid her share. So between her lawyers bill and paying her share of the mortgage agreement, I'm out $20,000.



So I decide, fine, I just will take the $20,000 out $600/month at time until the $20,000 is paid off. A couple of months go by and guess what, I get served papers that I haven't been paying my spousal support. So, my response is, I've prepaid my spousal support. Her lawyer gets pretty nervous when I show him the evidence because he knew nothing about this. Why is her lawyer nervous? Here is where I really find out about lawyers.



After spending over $10K on my own lawyers, plus picking up the tab for most of her legal bills both on credit cards I had to pay off and her lawyers lien, I didn't have any money left over. I couldn't afford a lawyer. So I look at the law myself to figure out how this pays off and what do I find:



1: My so called legal team did NOTHING---NADA, NYET. The extent of their work was filling out paperwork for the court. Standing with me in court when the judge told me I needed to pay her support NOW, and essentially brokering this deal the ex and I came up with. I refused to sign the deal for about 5 months because the lawyer that wrote it (hers) wrote it so poorly that it was virtually unreadable. I'm not talking legaleze, I'm talking just plain confusing, mis-written, just shit. Of course, I had to point all this out to my legal team ($300/hour for what?) because they never read it.



2. My legal team never filed paper work that was within my right to recover joint debt and even credit card charges that were made with a split and divorce in mind (her lawyers retainer!) even though I read clearly in the family law that this was perfectly acceptable. Lawyers can certainly collect a retainer, but they can't do any work!



So why is her Lawyer nervous? (from paragraph 5 above) Her lawyer is nervous because when I researched the law, the lien he placed on the house was an ethical violation of the law and State Bar. He convinced her to drop her claims to spousal support. You would think this is good huh? NOT SO.

So, I'm reading the law and it has a lot of information about Statute of Limitations regarding when money and items can be claimed or not and I figured I had about 3 weeks to file something or I would not be able to bring this up in court again. Since the original case was dropped, a judge never ruled on the validity of the claim. As you will see it didn't make any difference any way. So I filed a petition to get a judges ruling.

So we go to court. What's the judge say? "You need to hire a lawyer. You can't bring this up in this court, it needs to go to another court system. Plus you used the wrong forms and didn't give me a complete current statement of Income and Expense." Then in the same speech he tells me, "You are still required to pay Spousal Support of $600 per month, that's in my order."

The order also says that we are to split assets 50:50. But I guess $20K extra to the other side doesn't violate the order. The judge is a Prick. His name is listed below along with all the attorneys so that you know in Modesto, California, what lawyers to shy away from. Actually, you are better off staying away from all these leeches and bloodsuckers. Of course, the judge feeds from the trough of the taxpayer and is above taking any time to actually look into anything, just another government worker who could really care less and you know what, I get the feeling he doesn't really know the law either. Prick!

So now I need to go get a Lawyer. But every lawyer wants at least $1500 as a retainer. What to do. I think both my ex and her lawyer will be sued in the near future and since I know that her lawyer has lots of dough...I think I'm going to sue for all my aggravation, grief and time. I'd say, $80K-100K would be in order? What do you think?


Worthless Modesto, California Lawyers: My side.

Rebecca Roberson, attorney at law: Fired for not fighting for my rights. Worthless.

The law firm of Strauss, Neibauer & Anderson. In particular Tom Anderson. DO NOTHING firm that charges $300 per hour. Did I say they 'did nothing' and charged me $300 bucks an hour for it? Maybe I mentioned it once or twice.

Her Side:

Bernie Kempen: Ethically challenged and should be removed from the State Bar.

Judge Jack Jacobson: Prefers that lawyers do everything and has a real leaning towards the female side no matter what. A government drone bee, sucking off the nectar of the taxpayer and providing no benefit to society.